Transcript
WEBVTT
00:00:01.181 --> 00:00:11.714
Welcome back to ADHD Money Talk, the show that has not been consistently putting out podcast episodes for all of you lovely people, but guess what?
00:00:11.714 --> 00:00:15.505
There's an episode today and we can't change the past.
00:00:15.505 --> 00:00:25.629
I don't want to change the past because I've been busy, being way too busy with self-inflicted busyness, and that is my life.
00:00:25.629 --> 00:01:26.536
That's just what's been going on Working on too many projects, trying to do too much stuff but the bottom line is a lot of my busyness has been in preparation for something that I'm very excited about, and I have very little hints to give you, like none, except for that you're going to want to stay tuned because I will be unleashing the best thing that's ever happened for ADHDers who want to get their money together, be in control of their money and be guided by somebody who consistently delivers an approach that is sensitive just sensitive, because I am sensitive, but also an approach that is sensitive and aware and totally focused on the shortcomings that we adhders have when it comes to managing our money, which everybody's different.
00:01:26.796 --> 00:01:28.221
Everybody's got different shortcomings.
00:01:28.221 --> 00:01:34.134
Everybody with ADHD has various strengths and weaknesses that apply to money.
00:01:34.134 --> 00:01:38.466
You know some are very good at getting on a.
00:01:38.466 --> 00:01:42.082
You know some know have the knowledge for money.
00:01:42.082 --> 00:01:49.230
So it's just about getting the motivation, the correct motivation, and some people don't have enough knowledge that it's overwhelming and intimidating.
00:01:49.230 --> 00:02:04.468
And then we all typically struggle with the constant stimulation chase, whether that's spending too much money on stuff that's stimulating or whether that's not staying consistently stimulated by managing money effectively.
00:02:05.450 --> 00:02:20.020
So until you can figure out why it's worth it intrinsically, at the deepest, rudest, corest level, it's going to be tough, but what I'm going to unleash on the world is going to have a lot of that and more, and I can't wait.
00:02:20.020 --> 00:02:21.104
It's going to be so exciting.
00:02:21.104 --> 00:02:28.326
I thought it was going to be here already, because I have magical thinking and I'm like, oh, this project two months?
00:02:28.326 --> 00:02:32.443
Nah, it's been like seven months now, but it's coming.
00:02:32.443 --> 00:02:33.123
It's coming.
00:02:33.123 --> 00:02:36.211
I'm just learning to take my time, but it's coming.
00:02:36.211 --> 00:02:45.180
So, with all that said, if you still have this podcast checked off as a following and you get a notification or whatever when a new one comes out.
00:02:45.180 --> 00:02:47.187
Thank you, because maybe you saw this.
00:02:47.187 --> 00:02:49.854
I'm going to talk to somebody today.
00:02:49.854 --> 00:02:57.397
This is going to be a conversation with Shell Mendelson, who is an ADHD career coach and she's great.
00:02:57.397 --> 00:02:58.622
You should use her.
00:02:58.622 --> 00:03:09.901
I mean, if you look in the mirror and you say this is what I'm doing with my life right now I go to this job nine to five and if you can look at yourself in the mirror and say this is what I'm doing with my life right now I go to this job nine to five and if you can look at yourself in the mirror and say I am fulfilled in this, this is what I want, then you don't need her.
00:03:09.901 --> 00:03:28.287
But if you want a career that aligns with your values, that aligns with your financial goals, and you want help figuring out that whole, all the stuff there's a lot more than you think that goes beneath the surface of figuring this stuff out.
00:03:28.287 --> 00:03:29.610
She's an expert at it.
00:03:30.091 --> 00:03:30.913
I talked to her today.
00:03:30.913 --> 00:03:37.823
She's so fun to talk to, like she's just so chill and we recorded this like maybe two months ago and she's just been like bugging me, like get it out, get it out.
00:03:37.823 --> 00:03:47.216
I'm just like, I'm in paralysis of like I can't do anything besides, just do what my brain is yelling at me to do, which is get caught up on the millions of things that I'm not caught up on.
00:03:47.216 --> 00:03:49.304
And she just kept nagging and nagging.
00:03:49.304 --> 00:03:49.846
And you know what?
00:03:49.846 --> 00:03:56.451
It's like the kind of nagging that's like the best kind of nag, because it's like you're so right, I need to do this.
00:03:56.451 --> 00:03:57.420
Like what am I doing?
00:03:57.420 --> 00:03:59.645
It's like it's like the shame you want.
00:04:01.270 --> 00:04:03.495
She's going to listen to this and be like, what the heck are you talking about?
00:04:03.495 --> 00:04:08.046
So, anyways, I'm pretty sure this conversation starts off like mid-sentence or something.
00:04:08.046 --> 00:04:10.001
So I know you're gonna get a lot out of it.
00:04:10.001 --> 00:04:18.211
You're gonna get a lot more out of this conversation than you have over the past five minutes of me just talking about basically, basically nothing.
00:04:18.211 --> 00:04:20.117
So let's do the talk.
00:04:20.117 --> 00:04:21.141
Let's talk to shell.
00:04:21.141 --> 00:04:21.903
Hi, shell.
00:04:21.903 --> 00:04:24.749
So like why did you write this book?
00:04:24.910 --> 00:04:41.903
it's long like you wrote a lot well, it's 35 years of all the work that I've done, not just before I was diagnosed, but certainly after I was diagnosed, and I'll go back and say that I was trained by richard bowles, who wrote what color is your parachute?
00:04:41.903 --> 00:04:48.644
And I was using, and always have used, that format, that basic format, for years.
00:04:48.644 --> 00:04:55.024
But what I found was, even before I was diagnosed, later in life, I was starting to tweak it quite a bit.
00:04:55.024 --> 00:05:15.744
The order of how things were presented I had to change to fit what I thought was easier for people to understand and made more sense in general, and I had to add additional graphics because I am a visual learner and many of the people I work with are visual learners.
00:05:15.744 --> 00:05:26.733
So I started doing lots of graphics and using metaphors to illustrate ideas that I was trying to get across to people to make it easier, simpler to digest.
00:05:26.733 --> 00:05:42.372
And always my goal was how do you get people who can't articulate and don't know what they want in their work to finally be able to gain that clarity and focus and speak of it and articulate it?
00:05:42.372 --> 00:05:59.684
That's a tall order and I think a lot of people, many people, most people, have not had any kind of schooling or coursework or direction regarding how to do that step by step.
00:06:00.285 --> 00:06:02.870
Lots of career books out there, lots of stuff.
00:06:02.870 --> 00:06:10.427
Parachute was the first one that I found that actually did the work, you know, help people sort of break things down.
00:06:10.427 --> 00:06:15.471
But what I found and I still love Parachute and I always say get that book as a resource.
00:06:15.471 --> 00:06:20.952
It's a big book and it's a great resource to have and everyone should have a copy of it.
00:06:20.952 --> 00:06:23.728
And I'd say, get the 2017 edition.
00:06:24.701 --> 00:06:26.348
So it's Parachute by who?
00:06:27.040 --> 00:06:28.704
What Color is your Parachute?
00:06:28.704 --> 00:06:31.129
By Richard N Bowles.
00:06:31.129 --> 00:06:47.572
Now, richard N Bowles was a person who trained me in the process himself and me, myself and other career people and just job changers were all there for three weeks getting indoctrinated in this process.
00:06:47.572 --> 00:07:01.750
I did it several times so that I could really get a good sense, because I was already a career counselor and I just wanted to have the method that I could use with other people, and so from that I started working in in-person groups.
00:07:01.750 --> 00:07:18.466
I mean, I've been doing this for 30, close to 35 years now and it's changed, it's shifted and changed along with my own need for changing things up, being flexible, growing in my field, having fun with what I'm doing.
00:07:18.466 --> 00:07:20.471
You know you've got ADHD.
00:07:20.471 --> 00:07:21.600
You know we can't be bored.
00:07:21.600 --> 00:07:23.341
We got to love what we do.
00:07:23.341 --> 00:07:24.723
Got to love it.
00:07:24.723 --> 00:07:30.750
Yeah, if we didn't love it, how good do you think we'd really be at what we do if we didn't love it?
00:07:31.110 --> 00:07:35.113
If we didn't love it, it would become a soul-sucking chore.
00:07:35.754 --> 00:07:37.396
Soul-sucking is a perfect word to use.
00:07:37.396 --> 00:07:38.540
Yeah, perfect words.
00:07:38.540 --> 00:07:43.793
I have heard many people use those terms, soul-sucking, and they come to me.
00:07:43.793 --> 00:07:46.422
They're in soul-sucking and they come to me.
00:07:46.422 --> 00:07:49.105
They're in these soul-sucking, freaking jobs that they have to go to every day.
00:07:49.105 --> 00:08:09.028
And then many people get slotted into these performance improvement programs PIPs, which I'm sure you're familiar with that are the kiss of death, literally, for people with ADHD in terms of keeping their jobs or actually improving things, because they don't really improve.
00:08:09.028 --> 00:08:12.283
They just are one step to, you know, being let loose.
00:08:13.004 --> 00:08:18.461
And in the meantime the people involved in those programs incur such trauma.
00:08:18.461 --> 00:08:29.088
I mean, I've talked to so many traumatized people that have gone through that kind of a process because they don't even deal with the work that they're doing or try to improve it.
00:08:29.088 --> 00:08:34.307
They just make it harder for them and they become more watched.
00:08:34.307 --> 00:08:43.431
So once you get into one of those, I always say it's time to start exiting or finding an exit as quickly, as soon as you can.
00:08:43.431 --> 00:09:04.009
And this process that I do is the step that pretty much everyone needs, whether it's with me or a book I don't know if you can do a book great to figure this stuff out, so that you don't make the same mistakes over and over and over again, which is what happens when people don't have any kind of structure for doing this work.
00:09:04.009 --> 00:09:05.511
People don't have any kind of structure for doing this work.
00:09:05.532 --> 00:09:06.793
So I offer the masterclass.
00:09:06.793 --> 00:09:18.825
That's what I got started three and a half years ago now and they've been going full on ever since I started.
00:09:18.825 --> 00:09:35.225
And from doing that masterclass I finally wrote the book, because I was writing it the whole time that I was presenting it to people, shifting and changing and adding things to it, and I got tired of having to tweak everything and I said I just have to do it myself.
00:09:35.225 --> 00:09:38.860
I just got to do it myself and I just buckled down and did it.
00:09:38.860 --> 00:09:45.732
And it was a labor of love, for sure, because I know there's nothing else out there like this.
00:09:45.732 --> 00:09:46.914
You've seen it right.
00:09:46.914 --> 00:09:48.505
Have you seen anything like it?
00:09:48.866 --> 00:09:49.028
No.
00:09:49.561 --> 00:09:52.448
No, nothing exists like this that I'm aware of.
00:09:52.448 --> 00:09:53.431
I did the research.
00:09:53.431 --> 00:09:56.469
It's very ADHD friendly, is it not?
00:09:57.779 --> 00:09:58.721
Yeah, you've got.
00:09:58.721 --> 00:10:05.631
You have like 100 and something pages dedicated to careers in ADHD and helping people.
00:10:05.631 --> 00:10:08.241
I mean, that's boom, there's nothing.
00:10:08.442 --> 00:10:09.304
Breaking it down.
00:10:09.304 --> 00:10:13.159
Yeah, it's got the exercises that ask you the pertinent questions.
00:10:13.159 --> 00:10:22.120
It helps to allow you to identify your what I call must haves, the things that are so important to you.
00:10:22.120 --> 00:10:30.269
I would assume for you, david, money topics, or you know, you're the skill of helping people grow their money or whatever it is.
00:10:30.269 --> 00:10:35.328
That skill is that you have has to be used for you to feel fulfilled.
00:10:35.328 --> 00:10:37.013
Is that true or not true?
00:10:37.879 --> 00:10:38.380
That's true.
00:10:38.380 --> 00:10:57.280
I think I've learned through my own journey of doing what I'm doing that the fulfillment is coming more from watching clients succeed as opposed to like just talking about money doesn't really do anything for me, but it's in the context of talking about it so that someone can have their life be changed for the better.
00:10:58.302 --> 00:11:07.719
And I think you're very typical, as I am, of people with with ADHD in terms of being purpose-driven, like we have a purpose.
00:11:07.719 --> 00:11:09.982
Having a purpose is everything.
00:11:09.982 --> 00:11:12.469
It sets the groundwork for what we do.
00:11:12.469 --> 00:11:30.932
Next, it sets the groundwork for what we do every day, and when you really understand who you are and you own all the elements that are super important to you your must haves and you take a look at them and you drown out the voices telling you this isn't going to work, that's not going to work.
00:11:30.932 --> 00:11:31.682
Have you tried this?
00:11:31.682 --> 00:11:32.785
Have you tried that?
00:11:32.785 --> 00:11:34.413
And you know what I'm talking about.
00:11:34.413 --> 00:11:45.268
That's called the safekeeping self, the term I use, and it was coined by Richard Bowles many, many years ago, and I just always expand on that, the safekeeping self.
00:11:45.347 --> 00:11:46.190
What is that?
00:11:46.799 --> 00:11:59.072
The safekeeping self is the I can't, I won't, I shouldn't All the reasons that we have for not making certain choices that we know are going to move us forward in a positive way.
00:11:59.072 --> 00:12:20.210
Even the smallest things like acknowledging that you enjoy art, if you're a business person or if you're an accountant, and you enjoy some aspects of the visual arts and actually they're kind of important for you to have in the work that you do on some level.
00:12:20.210 --> 00:12:23.296
But it doesn't mean you have to be a visual artist.
00:12:23.296 --> 00:12:49.426
But just acknowledging that, without and wholeheartedly saying yes, it's important to me, without fear of it taking your money down a few notches, just being bold enough to say this is important to me, these are my must-haves, because without being able to do that, without doing that, in a sense you're saying I'm not important, what I want isn't important.
00:12:49.426 --> 00:13:00.927
And with ADHD, if we don't acknowledge all of that at some point, we will never get to the place that we really are going to be, is going to be sustainable over the long haul.
00:13:01.268 --> 00:13:07.769
You know, in terms of the work we do, you know the shiny object things that people go for like, oh, I've got a great.
00:13:07.769 --> 00:13:12.344
Either I've got a great idea or I saw this job that looks like it might be cool.
00:13:12.344 --> 00:13:15.511
Or I saw this program that looks like it might be cool.
00:13:15.511 --> 00:13:18.645
I think I'll invest a few thousand bucks in this thing.
00:13:18.645 --> 00:13:21.653
That looks really I call it shiny object classes.
00:13:21.653 --> 00:13:25.801
You know, I think I'll try this.
00:13:25.821 --> 00:13:33.243
I think think I'll try that you know what I'm talking about any of the people that of your audience know what I'm talking about and I certainly was there.
00:13:33.363 --> 00:13:48.730
I have been there completely it's hard, especially when when you just keep hopping from shiny object class to hop shiny object class, but it's always done impulsively and without any real pre-thinking about like why am I really doing this?
00:13:48.850 --> 00:13:51.921
it's just yeah, I know something feels good about it.
00:13:51.921 --> 00:13:57.759
It's not that they should be, it should be totally disregarded, but it tends to get disregarded.
00:13:57.759 --> 00:14:23.529
When you do it, you drop it and you don't finish it, and then you feel bad about that and you look back but there's something that you that drew you there that is of importance yeah, like I think something like internal within you that's just having a hard time articulating itself, that's sort of like expressing itself through this, like never-ending search for something more or new, more and new totally when you ask about the book.
00:14:24.311 --> 00:14:26.955
The book sort of helps on many levels.
00:14:26.955 --> 00:14:35.806
It also provides that kind of emotional support to help you notice when that safekeeping self is entering the room.
00:14:35.806 --> 00:14:38.868
I call it.
00:14:40.448 --> 00:14:58.548
It reminded me of something I've learned in my psychology of financial planning studies, where a lot of our money beliefs that we think we have, that we think are our beliefs, or the things that we think that we should be doing with our money.
00:14:58.548 --> 00:14:59.774
They're not really what we want to be doing with our money.
00:14:59.774 --> 00:15:00.860
It's just something that we've been told we should do.
00:15:00.860 --> 00:15:06.139
So that's why there's never any real commitment or follow through or execution on it.
00:15:06.139 --> 00:15:10.129
It's because it's something that you have been told over and over again.
00:15:10.129 --> 00:15:11.846
This is what you need to do, this is what you should do.
00:15:11.846 --> 00:15:27.292
You should have an emergency fund that's this big, you should have this and that, but really it's not what you actually want, and so you have to really disregard what society says sometimes and figure out what is it that you really want, even if it's not the thing that your parents would want you to do or that society would approve of.
00:15:27.292 --> 00:15:32.830
You have to connect to what it is that you really want, which I think is what you're basically saying in your domain.
00:15:33.659 --> 00:15:40.640
But you really want and own it, and own it unapologetically, and that's the hard part for a lot of people.
00:15:40.640 --> 00:15:44.730
So we want to please so many of our family members, friends.
00:15:44.730 --> 00:15:52.773
We want people to know that we're on track and we try and fit in a lot of times when it's not really easy to do.
00:15:52.773 --> 00:15:55.365
But I love what you said about money.
00:15:55.365 --> 00:16:04.147
I think the money part plays into this whole process and it comes in the form of what are your actual expenses?
00:16:04.147 --> 00:16:09.855
What is the baseline of what you need to make and earn before you can even look at anything else?
00:16:09.855 --> 00:16:22.033
And how are you going to make sure that that's being covered, even if it means maybe taking what I call a means to an end job in addition to getting some training or something like that?
00:16:22.033 --> 00:16:27.567
But if you don't have those numbers in front of you, you can't be very realistic about it, right?
00:16:27.567 --> 00:16:34.990
That's just one of the factors that we look at, and it doesn't mean that they can't change or they can't be.
00:16:35.774 --> 00:16:38.022
Somebody really called me on that one the other day.
00:16:38.022 --> 00:16:40.106
I'm trying to think the situation.
00:16:40.106 --> 00:16:48.227
They were saying yeah, when you know that you also need to know to be able to move things around or to take things out.
00:16:48.227 --> 00:16:51.548
It gives you a chance to see what you're actually spending money on.
00:16:51.548 --> 00:16:55.871
So you can actually decide oh, I don't think that's important to spend money on anymore.
00:16:55.871 --> 00:17:06.060
Maybe I can get things down to, if I have to take like an intern job that doesn't pay me quite as much, that if I take this out I can move it around and make it work.
00:17:06.060 --> 00:17:09.369
So it gives you more incentive to actually make it work.
00:17:09.369 --> 00:17:12.028
And, by the way, you're listed as a resource in the book.
00:17:12.028 --> 00:17:12.590
You know that.
00:17:12.913 --> 00:17:13.494
I do know that.
00:17:13.494 --> 00:17:14.420
Thank you very much.
00:17:14.420 --> 00:17:15.423
I appreciate it.
00:17:15.423 --> 00:17:18.651
You're welcome, yeah, when you're, as you're saying.
00:17:18.651 --> 00:17:31.510
That it kind of is giving me flashbacks of various meetings I've had with clients where we're kind of discussing like what are the main things you can do to improve your current financial situation?
00:17:31.510 --> 00:17:37.290
You can either spend less and save more, or you can spend the same and make more and save more.
00:17:37.290 --> 00:17:40.625
And then the third is you can you can have your investments do better.
00:17:40.625 --> 00:17:57.933
But the first two are the ones that are like I get in these conversations where it's almost like the advice that they don't want to hear is that I think you should consider finding a way to make more money yeah because it's like, well, how, and I only have so many ideas on that.
00:17:58.580 --> 00:18:17.631
but if you're, if your vision for your life is so and so, but your current career and income trajectory doesn't support that, then to me that just seems like a prudent thing to start exploring, because you're so limited by your income, on what you can do to get more financially healthy.
00:18:17.631 --> 00:18:19.480
So which kind of sucks.
00:18:19.480 --> 00:18:23.527
In general, I mean, it's a kind of a sucky thing to have to always be dealing with.
00:18:23.567 --> 00:18:26.431
but but you can give yourself an automatic raise.
00:18:26.431 --> 00:18:39.969
If you look, if you look at your expenses with with absolute authenticity and honesty, and you go, oh my gosh, I'm spending so much money on this stupid cable channel and I could just stream.
00:18:39.969 --> 00:18:47.432
You know, I mean Siri different little things that could end up maybe making you a thousand bucks more a month.
00:18:47.432 --> 00:18:48.670
You never know.
00:18:49.494 --> 00:18:50.296
Oh yeah, easy.
00:18:50.296 --> 00:18:59.480
For so many people the thing is on paper, it always looks so easy, and then it's like okay, here's a list of things you're gonna do, and if you do these, you're gonna have 1000 extra bucks in your pocket.
00:18:59.480 --> 00:19:14.828
And then first, for one reason or another, there's often still something, some resistance, that they didn't really think over the feedback I get from people who've gone through the expenses part.
00:19:14.929 --> 00:19:20.811
just list your expenses in here, or some of the expenses to consider, and then add whatever else is that?
00:19:20.811 --> 00:19:29.743
It helps them to do exactly that, Because then they see oh my gosh, how much am I spending on that.
00:19:29.743 --> 00:19:31.934
It really does help them get a reality check on that.
00:19:33.195 --> 00:19:33.336
It does.
00:19:33.336 --> 00:19:35.520
It's pretty cool how that works.
00:19:35.520 --> 00:19:43.066
Just seeing it is like eye opening, and that's kind of what a lot of us just actually are avoiding is actually just looking at it.
00:19:43.066 --> 00:19:57.064
So once you're kind of looking at it, it's equal parts scary, but then it quickly the actual satisfaction of looking at it takes over, because you're like at least I know what I'm dealing with now, as opposed to just pretending it doesn't exist.
00:19:57.465 --> 00:19:59.099
Yeah, and then it's fun.
00:20:00.017 --> 00:20:01.108
It can be very fun.
00:20:01.451 --> 00:20:06.546
Yeah, I'm going to chop this one off and or switch this one out for something.
00:20:06.546 --> 00:20:13.077
You know, I can take this class or I could do this thing that I've always wanted to do, or maybe go on a vacation or do something.
00:20:13.077 --> 00:20:17.488
If I just don't do this thing that I've always wanted to do, or maybe go on a vacation or do something if I just don't do this, whatever, I know we can get into that.
00:20:17.488 --> 00:20:34.605
You've probably had these conversations a lot, but as far as making a career shift, it can really help if you need to get some more training, for example, in something very specific and one of the things the book and working with me in the class, because that's a deeper dive, by the way.
00:20:34.605 --> 00:20:35.676
So I do.
00:20:35.777 --> 00:20:39.853
I still do the masterclass for people and the book is part of the masterclass.
00:20:39.853 --> 00:20:42.319
So they go through the book while we're we're getting.
00:20:42.319 --> 00:20:48.784
They're getting coached as they go along the way with accountability, and accountability is a big part of it, right?
00:20:48.784 --> 00:21:03.481
So the other people in in the cohort in the class help each other out in terms of networking and staying on track and doing the exercises body doubling and all of that While in the class they're getting coached.
00:21:03.481 --> 00:21:11.326
But the book will take you through a lot of that, and it is possible to do the book with other people, not by yourself.
00:21:11.326 --> 00:21:14.233
With ADHD, it's very tough to do it on your own.
00:21:14.233 --> 00:21:15.778
You need to have some accountability.
00:21:15.778 --> 00:21:18.044
Oh yes, absolutely and.
00:21:18.084 --> 00:21:21.681
I have a whole section called accountability and you are your accountability.
00:21:21.681 --> 00:21:23.987
I can't remember the title exactly, but it's.
00:21:23.987 --> 00:21:27.702
It talks about different ways that you can stay on track.
00:21:27.702 --> 00:21:30.188
That that are fun Makes sense, you know.
00:21:30.714 --> 00:21:31.297
Yeah for sure.
00:21:31.297 --> 00:21:48.701
So I'm looking at your book now and what are some of the like key symptoms, I guess, or kind of flags in your mind of like, okay, this person is, doesn't, is not happy in their career, there's some disconnect, or just like, what are some of the common things you see in people that are coming to you?
00:21:48.701 --> 00:21:54.019
Like, what are some of the common complaints that come in like frustrations, and let's go down that line of thinking?
00:21:54.019 --> 00:21:57.402
I know I just kind of said it in a few different ways, but I think you get where I'm going with it.
00:21:58.083 --> 00:22:02.208
Well, for one thing, anyone that contacts me, I assume, needs help on some level.
00:22:02.208 --> 00:22:05.771
I can't figure it out, or struggling to figure it out.
00:22:05.771 --> 00:22:13.767
I shouldn't say they can't, but they're challenged in that way and some people are feeling more frustrated than others.
00:22:13.767 --> 00:22:17.766
Some people just want more options.
00:22:17.766 --> 00:22:26.845
So, on the lighter side, they want more options, they have some idea and, even lighter than that, they actually like their jobs.
00:22:26.845 --> 00:22:36.643
But now they want to see well, maybe there's a lateral move or there's more opportunities to do more of what I like or to do different aspects of what I like.
00:22:36.643 --> 00:22:38.902
So that's on the lighter side.
00:22:38.902 --> 00:22:41.763
On the more intense side, it's like they don't have a clue.
00:22:41.763 --> 00:22:45.727
They really are frustrated and they just want the direction.
00:22:45.727 --> 00:22:47.240
They want a way to figure it out.
00:22:47.875 --> 00:22:49.502
How do I figure out my must-haves?
00:22:49.502 --> 00:22:51.618
What do I actually need?
00:22:51.618 --> 00:22:52.300
Who am I?
00:22:52.300 --> 00:22:53.804
Who the heck am I?
00:22:53.804 --> 00:22:55.827
And also what's my purpose.
00:22:55.827 --> 00:23:08.386
People don't directly ask for that in this, but that's part of what it culminates and ends up offering as well is a way to really understand what your purpose is, your overall.
00:23:08.386 --> 00:23:10.037
That goes beyond work.
00:23:10.037 --> 00:23:14.045
It's just like when you have that, it makes it.
00:23:14.045 --> 00:23:21.808
It is kind of like that fire that is lit underneath all of us to keep us going, knowing that, oh, I'm here for a reason.
00:23:21.808 --> 00:23:23.057
I got to do this thing.
00:23:23.057 --> 00:23:25.383
If I don't do it, who's going to do it?
00:23:25.383 --> 00:23:26.846
Somebody's got to do it.
00:23:26.846 --> 00:23:28.096
Might as well be me.
00:23:28.096 --> 00:23:29.378
That's kind of how I am.
00:23:29.378 --> 00:23:30.902
That's how I started.
00:23:30.902 --> 00:23:33.606
I ended up doing pretty much everything I've done.
00:23:40.375 --> 00:23:41.498
Yeah, purpose is so, so key, like for most of my clients.
00:23:41.498 --> 00:23:43.020
We have like an established like statement of financial purpose.
00:23:43.020 --> 00:23:50.345
You need to have that kind of North Star guiding your decisions and your life, otherwise you just kind of float.
00:23:50.345 --> 00:23:51.267
It's like what's the point?
00:23:51.267 --> 00:23:53.178
You know it just, I don't know just.
00:23:53.438 --> 00:24:06.438
it really solidifies so much for people it really does and I wish everyone really got that yeah it's hard to find, though, especially if you're coming from a place of like real kind of like purposelessness.
00:24:06.438 --> 00:24:17.487
It could be hard and it would take a lot of work, but I, I truly believe that, um, with the right support and and with the work that you have to put into figuring it out, it can be done.
00:24:18.429 --> 00:24:29.483
Yeah, and I think one of the good things about going through this process is I try and make it fun and interesting and break it down, and it's got to have some cool visuals.
00:24:29.615 --> 00:24:57.500
It's got to keep us engaged, have different ways to keep us engaged, it's got to keep us engaged, have different ways to keep us engaged, and if we don't have, that it's not you know, for people with ADHD, you know, mean it's yeah, like the first thing I ever wrote for adhd and money.
00:24:57.641 --> 00:25:13.183
When I reread it back to myself now which I think is people can still get like on my website I'm like, well, this isn't really adhd friendly because it required me to work with a lot of people and to actually see this all happening in real life, like if I were to rewrite a book now, it would be so different than the first thing I wrote.
00:25:13.183 --> 00:25:27.362
Yeah, more pictures, pictures, visuals, short chunks of words, not long paragraphs, exactly bullets, graphics, interactiveness, make it kind of like a treasure hunt.
